A George About Nothing
by Wario the TableMan
Summary: New York is in certain peril when Costanza refuses to show at Monk's Cafe


Jerry jeered at his component from across the table. Today was the ultimate fifth day of being at Monk's Cafe. It was already the eleventh time that he heard Aha's "Take On Me" on the Radio64 by Nintendo (the Wii people).

Kramer stirred his latte with his metallic spoon that he bought from Joe Metallica, lead band dude of the Heartbreakers.

Elaine ate her croissant and thought about the pudding in front of them.

"Shall we eat it?" asked Jerry. He took out his battle axe and pointed at the dish.

"I can't due to my condition..." mourned Kramer.

"Kramer, what is your condition?" asked Elaine.

Kramer waved a hand. "Oh, I don't wanna force that kind of burden on you guys..."

"Most obliged," said Jerry. He looked out the window and saw the incoming maelstrom worsen due to the anticipation of immediate pudding consumption. "I am so over this climate! Where is our guy Costanza, homes?"

"Maybe he got lost?" suggested Kramer.

Elaine blasted Kramer's jacket with a laser cannon. Kramer's jacket died for the first time that day. He quickly buried it in his bacon burger and rested his head on the table with serious belief in cashews.

Jerry noticed the door open with the power of his listening ears. He turned to see a very formidable collection of abs. "I can see it now..." said the New York comedian of champions.

"Greetings Jerry..." said the newcomer. "My name is Little Mac. I am also a New Yorker and I have come baring troubling news..."

"Sit down and use your lips to speak," said Elaine, gesturing to the melancholy emptiness of the seat beside Kramer.

Little Mac took his rear and put it on the seat, then he sat down and spoke with words. "Jerry Seinfeld, I know you are a comedian."

Jerry was taken aback because he didn't know that this info got leaked. He could have sworn that he hid it in his save file for MGS52: The Phantom Stain.

"Gosh, I never knew you had it in you, Jerry!" analyzed Kramer with his spiky head.

Elaine took her eyes to the cactus Little Mac had brought alongside him. "Who is this partner of yours?"

"This is Maractus. He is the ambassador to the Pokemon world. Apparently, totes bad madness is corrupting every sacred centimeter of the WTTMCU..."

"Yes, and my grand bay got swamped mere moments ago," said Maractus. He twirled his mustache as a chihuahua would should a chihuahua obtain such an item for nose. "We received a message from the darling daughter Pearl, but she could not defeat the massive evil..."

"Well, that's a shame..." said Jerry. He quickly ran outside with the ultimate ignorance of his life and his duty.

"What a duty-deleter!" snapped Kramer. "Do you want me to kick his captain's quarters?"

"Nay, hold your foot in its boot's place," said Little Mac. "We need to formulate a way to save the day."

"Why save the day, dudes?" asked Elaine. She got out her ipod and thought about how the 90s were all the rage. "Do you want a Gameboy?"

"Shut up, Elaine," said Maractus. He loved Elaine's hair, but not her Puddy-adoration habits.

"Maractus is correct. I want Kramer to shut up too," said Little Mac. "Kramer do not speak."

Kramer's lips were sealed like a guy with a key who had lost the lock many years ago.

"What do we do is determined by the fate of the multiverse," said Maractus. "We gotta boogie-woogie because I'm certified."

"Yeah, but I'm here," said a voice from the back room of the cafe.

It was...

George.

"Costanza?" asked Reylo-hunter Grand Cannoli.

"No, that is not your friend, Kramer and Ms. Benes," said Little Mac. "That is a bald man with severe issues!"

"No, I don't have an issue," said George. "I just need to defeat Christmas, bros."

"Gnarly!" screamed Kramer. He pulled out his twin beam katana and charged forward with blistering fury. He did a major ouch to George's arm, cutting it off like a Mr. PotatoHead that works properly.

"GROW!" shrieked George. His arm returned as it grew back. It was more extravagant with its muscle mass. It was also good-looking and Susan would probably agree wholeheartedly.

"But isn't Susan done?" asked Maractus.

"Shut up, having person!" said George. He then shot a nova blast at the sun. The sun 'sploded like a hot knife through jelly doughnuts and then all of Manhattan got major pain.

Jerry sat outside on the stoop, licking a lollipop that he purchased at the Jolly Ollie Man's house. He thought tearfully about the impending doom of the grand earth below his comedian feet. "My feet will never laugh again..." he wept.

"Hello, Jerry..." said a fat dude.

"Hello, Newman..." Jerry said annoyed. He and the other dude looked at each other with serious warrior eyes. The called upon their stands and began their heated battle in hand-to-stand combat as the entire world crumbled around them.

A squirrel slowly crept by, loaded a cannon, and blasted the moon. The moon withered away and became an estate for angry pigeons. Only Pigeon Man could save the wonderful domain now. Jerry knew this and so did you.

**||SCLERA**

**|QUALM**

**|||MANITOBA**

**|SENOIRITY**

**||NAMIBIA**

**|PHALANX**

**|||LEOJYLLIB**


End file.
